


The Human Male

by Asraella



Series: Death Note One Shots [1]
Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-28
Updated: 2020-01-09
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:55:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21997093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Asraella/pseuds/Asraella
Summary: He was no different than any other insignificant human whose sole purpose was to feed the lifespan of The Shinigami, but he wasn’t just any human.  He had Rem's Death Note and now she was bound to him until the end…
Series: Death Note One Shots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1583446
Comments: 3
Kudos: 5





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This Rem One Shot can stand alone or be read as part of my AU. Up to you! 
> 
> I was inspired by these four panels. It feels a little like Rem may have had feelings for someone else once, too, and can understand Misa's feelings for Light. 

Rem looked out over the decaying landscape that is the Shinigami Realm, the place she called home. It was dry. Barron. Empty. Neglected. All words that could describe her. All words no female would want to be known by, but she was known by them and he had made sure she felt it.

She let out a long exhale that was more of a wheeze than a sigh, a sound that seemed more like the air was being dragged from her lungs. She cast her gaze away from the desolate wasteland and on to the black bound book that was her Death Note. With slender, bony hands, she picked it up and started to leaf through the used pages. Most of them were scrawled with her familiar handwriting, a handwriting that was designed to claim human lives so she could extend her existence, an existence she wasn’t sure she cared about.  
One by one, she turned the pages until she got to the page, a singular reminder of how she let her feelings cloud her judgement.

There were only 2 names written in his foreign chicken scratch. Lead smudges and greasy fingerprints were careless adornments among the names he had written. There was nothing remarkable in the way he used the notebook. There was nothing remarkable about him.

“He was so disgusting,” she thought to herself as she let her mind drift back to that day…

***********

Rem leaned over the lookout into the human world, surveying the beings bustling around below. Most of them were completely unaware of the existence of the Shinigami. None of them knew that their sole purpose to the gods of death was to unwillingly sacrifice their lives to extend that of the Shinigami. 

There was no limit to the number of names one could write or rule to a specific length of time left on a lifespan a Shinigami had to adhere to. As long as she didn’t try to extend a life or take a life to save a life, she could choose her kills however she chose. When it came to the lives she took, she looked for lifespans that were near their expiration. Even though it meant she had to write more names to accomplish her task, it was a small concession that made her feel like less of a thief, less of a monster. 

She scanned the humans below for an acceptable lifespan to steal. After a few hundred people went by, there it was. Her mark had inadvertently wandered into her sights. With notebook and pen in hand, she began to write the name of the unsuspecting man, Shawn Paxton, who had walked into her sightline. Like a poetic hunter, she wrote the letters S-h-a-w-n-P-a-x-t, but before she could write the final two letters that would deal the fatal blow, she did something she had never done in the innumerable years she had existed. She lost her grip on the Death Note and the book fell from her hand and into the human world.

She watched helplessly as the notebook tumbled over and over itself until landing just feet in front of her victim. Luckily, as if it was an ordinary piece of trash, Shawn Paxton stepped over the notebook without so much as a glance and continued on into the remaining 8 and a half months of his life.  
Relieved, Rem flew as fast as she could towards her Death Note, twirling into a nosedive in hopes of accelerating her descent. She couldn’t risk someone else picking it up. Arms outstretched, she spiraled faster towards the ground, inches from her intended target. Her fingertips dusted across the cover just as a warm hand greedily, yet unintentionally snatched it from her grasp.

“Death Note? Heh, what the fu-AHH!” Wes Donnelly let out an uninhibited scream as his eyes took in the Shinigami standing before him, “What the hell are you?”

“You might want to stop talking. No one else can see me,” Rem said to the startled young man standing before her. His grip was tight on the notebook, but his hands were shaking uncontrollably. His bluish- green eyes were fixated on the shrouded goddess addressing him. 

“What the hell are you?” he asked again in a lowered tone that was only slightly less conspicuous. 

“I’m the Shinigami Rem and that is my Death Note you are holding,” she replied in her dark and melodious tones. “It’s the reason you can see me and no one else can.”

“So, like, do you want it back or something?” he asked, not sure what was expected of him.

“Yes, but I can’t just take it back. You have to give it back. Once a human picks it up, it belongs to the human world and that human has to forfeit ownership in order for me to regain it.”

“Uh, ok.” Wes had started to hand the notebook back to Rem but chose to yank it away just as she reached for it, “Wait, what exactly does it do?”

“I’m under no obligation to explain it to you,” was Rem’s simple reply.

Wes flipped through the pages of names. “Ok, list of names. So I’m going to just start writing names in it to see what happens,” he said like a contemptuous child, even though he had to be in his mid-20s. 

“No, you can’t do that. That’s not what it’s for.” There was a slight hint of panic in her voice that Wes didn’t percieve. Although she didn’t care about the human world, she did care about unleashing misery with no purpose.

“Heh, you don’t want me to do that, huh? Then let’s start writing and maybe you will tell me what it’s for.” He took out a pencil and opened to the first blank page. He was drawing a line in the sand. 

“Stop! Like I said before, it’s called the Death Note. It’s used to kill people,” She explained reluctantly. “Shinigami use it to extend their lives, but when humans use it, it only takes lives.” It was shameful for a Shinigami to be so easily manipulated, especially by a mere human.

“Ok, now we’re getting somewhere,” Wes smiled the taunting smile of someone with nothing inside. “Follow me back to my apartment. I have some questions for you, Rem was it?”

***********

“So I write a name and that person dies of a heart attack within 40 seconds?” Wes asked as he sat on his dingy plaid couch.

“Yes.” Rem wasn’t about to give him more information than he needed. He already knew enough to be dangerous. He could do enough damage with the information he already had. He certainly didn’t need to know about the Shinigami eyes.

“And you have to stay here until I give it back to you or I die.”

“Yes.”

“…or you die?”

“You can’t kill me.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t,” he said with a smile that somehow seemed more frown. “Anyway, I can think of worse company.”

A distorted smile came to Rem’s lips. He was nothing more than your average human male, but for some reason, she liked what he said about her. 

“Let’s see if you’re for real.” Wes took out the Death Note and started to write a name down.

“Don’t use it foolishly. Once you write a name you can’t undo it.”

“Yeah, Yeah, I’m not going to use it recklessly. I promise. I just want to get back at someone that made my life miserable for years. Plus, the dick almost got me killed when we were in high school,” he said in a way that was placating. She didn’t like being pacified, but she liked that he talked to he so easily. 

He wrote a name in the Death Note.

“It will be a few days before we know if it worked. So Rem, what’s it like where you’re from?”


	2. Chapter 2

Rem and Wes spent the next few days “hanging” as he called it. Humans were strange creatures. This one liked video games and drinking beer. He watched television. He slept. A lot. He didn’t seem to care what was happening in the world around him. What was important to Wes was Wes’ world, the world that didn’t extend far from the 4 walls of his apartment.

Over these days, the two of them talked about the Shinigami, their realm, the human world, people in general. Wes talked about his family, his dead-beat father that left when he was 12, his friends, how he dropped out of college in his 3rd year, his temp job that somehow became his low paying career, his 4 ex-girlfriends, 3 of whom had cheated on him. Rem had little to add to the conversation. She didn’t have stories like he did. Even though his life was a struggle, he still lived a life. 

While Wes talked, Rem found a hobby to fill her time in the human world. Her hobby was looking at Wes, like he was a painting, a masterpiece created by a long ago master. She was fascinated by how his skin, creamy and smooth, stretched effortlessly over his skeletal frame, moving at the will of each muscle’s command. How his hair was soft, brown, bouncy, fluid. How his eyes looked like wet, bluish-green orbs floating in his flesh covered skull. She liked that he looked squishy, full of working internal parts. She liked that he looked alive.

“You have a boyfriend, Rem?” Wes asked as he frantically pounded his thumbs on the buttons on the game controller. 

“No.” 

“A girlfriend?” he gave her a side-eyed look and raised an eyebrow, a smile grew on his face.

“Shinigami are not allowed to have mates.”

“Well, it’s overrated anyway. Trust me on this one. It’s not worth it. Though…You’re kinda pretty. Too bad,” he smirked. 

***********

The days passed. Wes looked in the paper daily at the obituaries, a morbid habit to see if his entry in the Death Note had worked. About a week after he first used it, the confirmation he was waiting for came.

“No shit. The fucker dropped dead of a heart attack. It worked. It fucking worked,” Wes said with amazement and a bit of pride. “You know, Rem, I feel like this was meant for me. I know you dropped it by accident and all, but I haven’t had any real way to change my life for, well, my entire life. Now I do. I don’t have to take shit from anyone anymore. This gives me the power to fix the wrongs in my life.”

“Wes, I know you feel like you are helpless, but you’re not. You don’t need the Death Note to make your life better.” She wasn’t sure why she cared about the simple human’s feelings.

“You just don’t want me to give it back,” he said with a hint of agitation, “I thought we were friends.” He sounded like a child betrayed.

“That’s not it. Besides, I can’t force you to give it back. That has to be your decision.”

“Good. For once, I have a choice and I choose to not give it back. Don’t worry, Remmy, I won’t use it unless someone really deserves it.” He smiled and grabbed her hand. “Now on to my next victim,” he laughed uninhibitedly.

At first she wasn’t sure what to say. She had grown to like this human, even care about him. It had only been a week in human time, but it felt a lot longer to a Shinigami. “You should know that humans who use the Death Note tend to have misfortune find them.” She felt that she should tell him. 

“My life is already a misfortune. How much worse can it get?” He said snidely. “Anyway, the next person I’m taking out is the fucker that assaulted my last girlfriend. She went to a party with her friends. Asshole waited until she was trashed and…” he trailed off, anger in his eyes. “No one believed her. She had a rough time after that and she broke it off with me a couple weeks later. ”

Rem felt something she had never felt before. She felt sympathy. Perhaps she was becoming more human than most humans.

“I’m sorry that happened to her.” Rem picked the pencil up off of the coffee table and handed it to him. 

“Really? You’re cool with this?” Wes took the pencil from her spindly fingers.

“No one should be mistreated, especially a woman.” Rem could never imagine being a weak female like human females are. 

Wes opened to the page he wrote on before and added the offender’s name. As with the last time, his handy work was confirmed in the obituaries a week later. 

“See, Remmy, good things can come from a human with a Death Note.”


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next few weeks, Wes kept his promise. He didn’t abuse the power the Death Note gave him. In fact, he never opened. It seemed he liked the idea of having power more than actually exerting it.

The two of them settled into a mundane human life. He would come home from work and tell her about his humdrum day, which ranged from difficult coworkers to who was sleeping with whom. He talked about the guys in the fantasy football league and what a bunch of tools they were. He talked about which temps he thought were hot. He talked about his boss being a douche that needed to buy pants that stayed up. Sometimes his stories would evolve into tales about when he was younger. Those were Rem’s favorite.

  
She sat with him while he played video games, always declining the second player controller. They ate pizza, which she found distasteful. At night, she crept into his room and watched him while he slept. It was a habit he wasn’t fond of.

“You know I love you, Remmy, but you’re creeping me out.”

“I love you, too, Wes…” Rem kept the thought to herself.

***********

“Remmy, you’ll never guess what happened. I was in the break room and a bunch of us were bitching about some dickhead customer that wanted their order replaced and Lisa from accounting came in. Long story short we went out for a drink after work. She’s coming over tomorrow night, so can you make yourself scarce?”  
At first, Rem didn’t comprehend what he was saying and then, it hit her. He wanted to be alone with this woman. Worse, he wanted her to be gone. Even though she knew her chest was empty, she swore she felt her heart break.

“…Why do you want me to leave?” She knew the answer, but she wanted to hear him say it.

“Because that’s what roommates do when the other brings home a date.”

“Why can’t I stay?”

“She can’t see you, but I can and I don’t want to watch you watching us…”

“Stop.” If Rem’s eyes had tear ducts, she knew they would be leaking.

“Remmy, why are you upset? You can leave the house, right?” He asked innocently, not knowing the answer.

“I’m your roommate? I thought you…”

A look of horror came across Wes’ face. “You thought…You thought we were a thing? How the hell could you think that?”

“You just, you seemed to want me around. You never use the Death Note. I thought you didn’t give it back…”

“You thought I didn’t give it back because I wanted you to stay. Remmy, I like you and all, but…”

“You said you love me…” her low voice managed to pierce the room.

“You mean when I tell you to stop watching me sleep? That’s a figure of speech! It’s like telling someone you’re cool with them, just not with what they’re doing. Don’t you get it?”  
“That’s not how Shinigami talk.”

“Remmy, I like you, I do, but we don’t understand each other.”

“Why would you share your life with me if you didn’t…”

“What, like we’re supposed to sit in silence for the rest of my life and not talk? You don’t exactly say much,” Wes sighed and tried to rein it in a little, “Look, this isn’t a big deal. I just need you to leave for a few hours.”

“No. I don’t have to. As long as you have my notebook, I don’t have to go anywhere.”

“Seriously? You’re going to fuck this up for me? Do you know how long it’s been since I…”

Rem interrupted him. “I don’t want to hear what you’re going to say.” Rem knew little of human mating and this certainly wasn’t going to be how she learned.

“Why are you being like this? You’re supposed to be my friend.” He was starting to lose his patience.

“I was never your friend. You tricked me. You said I was pretty, you gave me a nickname. You just pretended to love me. You just want the Death Note.” Rem’s words were scathing.

“How the hell could you think I would be attracted to you, forget love you? You’re a fucking Shinigami. You are an empty shell of a monster.”  
Rem’s entire demeanor changed, like his words painted a facade over her true expression. “You kept me here for the Death Note. You’re selfish.” Her words were now said with no emotion.

“I’m selfish? I killed two people. Two horrible people. You kill so you can live.”

“I’m a Shinigami. It’s my purpose to kill. I try to inflict as little harm as possible with my kills.”

“It’s not your purpose to kill. You have to kill. You have nothing inside of you keeping you alive. Even if you were pretty on the outside, you’re hideous on the inside. You are death. You are dust in some fucked up humanoid form.” Wes stopped talking, as if something was sinking in that he never noticed before. He walked over to the drawer in the coffee table and took out the Death Note. “Here. Take it. You’re free. Go. I don’t want it,” Wes said as he handed her the Death Note.

“Won’t you miss your new found power?”

“I don’t give a shit. I want you gone.”

Rem stood there. She didn’t move. She didn’t speak. She was like a living corpse standing in his living room.

Wes shoved the notebook towards her. “I would write your name in it right now if I thought it would kill you.”

Rem took the Death Note into her skeletal hand. “You just did.”

She erased his memory of her and his 2 kills. It was her duty as a Shinigami to do so. However, there was no way she could erase him from her memory. No matter how hard she tried.


	4. Chapter 4

Time passed and Rem’s love for Wes faded. Eventually all that remained was a dull ache that could not escape the confines of her brittle body . 

One day, Rem befriended the Shinigami Gelus. They had something in common. He, too, had fallen in love with a human, only he was smart about it. He watched her from the safety of the Shinigami realm where nothing could hurt him. Day in and day out he watch her as the lifespan above her head ticked lower and lower.

“Is today the day?” Rem asked, concerned for her friend and the beautiful human girl that Gelus watched over. He was less of a Shinigami and more of a guardian angel.

“Yes,” he replied in his muffled, scratchy voice. If Rem didn’t know better, she would have thought he was about to cry. 

“Do you know how?”

“Yes, a stalker is going to profess his love to her and kill her when she doesn’t return his affections.” He coughed out the words. “I don’t think I can take it. I have to do something.” Gelus opened his Death Note and wrote the stalker’s name in his notebook. Within 40 seconds, the attacker clutched his chest and fell to the ground, allowing the woman to escape, but this was no victory for the love sick god of death. Gelus had just broken a rule no Shinigami was allowed to break. He had just saved the young woman’s life.   
Within seconds, starting at his feet, Gelus turned into a swirling whirlwind of dust until he became part of the Shinigami realm. The last thing he saw was his remaining lifespan join the dwindling one of the girl that he loved. 

Rem looked at Gelus in shock. This is what happens when a Shinigami saves a life. Rem picked up the Death Note that used to belong to Gelus. She, too, had become invested in the life of this female human. With notebook in hand she once again descended into the human world.

***********

“He used it to kill your attacker. It was the last thing he ever did. He died for you. He loved you. I thought it was only right that his Death Note belong to you now. Hopefully you will appreciate what it is to be loved by a Shinigami.” 

“And I can kill anyone I want with it?” Misa Amane hopped on her bent knees on her bed, her blonde pigtails bouncing up and down on the sides of her head as she clutched Gelus’ Death Note to her chest. Her smile was wide and toothy beneath her plump, crimson lips. 

Rem couldn’t help but stare at her. Her eyes were huge and brown, framed in thick mascara painted lashes. She was soft and supple, full of small curves that were made out of warm skin. She could almost see the blood pumping through the girl’s veins. Misa was the most beautiful thing Rem had ever seen. 

“Yes, you can use it however you like.” She just wanted to see her smile more, even if it wasn’t directed at her.

“Oh, good! There’s someone I want to meet and I’m going to use it to get his attention. Actually, I have to meet him. He’s my hero, but I have to find him first. Rem, you will be my very best girlfriend and help me, won’t you?”

With a slight hesitation, Rem answered her new human friend. “I will help you Misa.” At least she knew from the start that Misa could never love her in return. “In fact, I can make it a little easier for you. I can grant you the Shinigami eyes. When you look at humans you will see their names and lifespans over their heads, just like the Shinigami do. “

“Really?!” She squealed. “Oh Rem! You’re wonderful!”

“I must tell you, you will lose half your remaining lifespan.” 

“Is that all? Yes, yes, absolutely! If I can meet my Kira, I will do anything. I will do anything for him! I have to thank him. He needs to know he has my undying devotion. ” Misa gushed over her Kira. “Besides, I have, like, a billion days added to my life from the Shinigami that died for me, right?”

“It’s not quite as much as you think. Please be sure that this male is worth it.”

“Oh, yes, I’m sure. I love him! I would give my entire life for him. Half is no big deal!”

“There is no guarantee that he will love you when you find him, Misa. This will just make finding him a little easier as anyone with a Death Note will not have a lifespan over his or her head.”

“I don’t care. I just want to find him and eventually I will make him love me. You’ll see!”

“What if he never loves you, Misa? It will hurt. Believe me. It will.” Rem stopped and thought for a moment. “Maybe you could find someone who does love you and you will have wasted half your life for someone who didn’t deserve it.” 

“It’s ok. It doesn’t matter. I will happily give up half my life for him. I could never love anyone else,” Misa chirped her adoration for the unknown killer. 

Rem felt an ache in the hollows of her chest. She was beginning to regret she ever mentioned the Shinigami eyes to her beloved Misa.


End file.
